Friday, December 11, 2009

December 11th; This Day in Chaos.


This is to the people who know what it feels like to be alone in that crowded room called planet Earth:

I have never been so worried (once again - for the millionth time).
I want to say that I am happy.
I miss my friends, family and pets.

The Christmas break is coming up and I think I know what I will do with it - absolutely everything that I can.

Too many times I have used the periods between semesters as 'breaks' - essentially time to do nothing but hang around the house because I can. This time I am going to do things differently. I am going to exhaust myself with experiences. I am going to fill both my days and nights with activity. I am not going to shun my friends. I am not going to avoid things that make me think. I am going to embrace it all. I want more to fill this void of feeling like less.

It has been roughly a year of college and I am beginning to tire of it. I like the day to day busyness but my brain is hurting. I have felt so nervous for so long that I cannot wait for the opportunity to work. Sometimes being a good student loses it's twinkle.

That time is now.

Wish me luck in this time of stress and contemplation. I fear I might need it (but probably not :P).


- Jeffrey

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