Raining in my Head

What the Hell?!

I was doing so well. I had finally got my mood up and was once again living the life I wanted.

A good solid five days - Wednesday to Monday - I was happy and excited. I say meaning in my life and I wanted to wake up with the sunrise.

My mood is still elevated but I have taken a sucker punch in the gut. She still won't talk to me. She hasn't answered or replied to a single one of my messages. I am being avoided.

To make things even better, my landlords think I have caused the recent water damage in my house. I am so upset. I take care of this old house as if it is my very own. It is a lovely piece of history and I adore it. I would never neglect a leak if I was aware of it. I literally came back to a flood and crumbling ceiling tiles. I have no idea how it happened.

I don't want to be angry. I don't want to be bitter. I hate this sorrow that is rekindling inside of me.

Good news is that I am thrilled to be back in school. Strange how one week I dread it and the next I am in love. The people are so fantastic and I am excited to meet my second half professors. Proof of my improved state is that I can write again (and it isn't all emo poetry). I am overjoyed with the thoughts floating around in my head just waiting to be written.

Finally - here is to you (where ever you are). Even if you don't ever read this, know that you are still the most special person I know.

♥